Politics

A Career-Long Freelance Writer Goes (Pro-)Postal

As the election nears—it’s only four weeks and two days away, in case you hadn’t heard; also, Christmas Eve comes out on December 24th this year—I’ve gotten a kick out of reading the testimonials on behalf of, and tirades against the survival of, the U.S. Post Office.

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Perfection and Presidents: Never the Twain Shall Tweet

When I was four, I learned there was no Santa Claus. The Easter Bunny told me. (This is one of my favorite Dad Jokes). Not long thereafter, when I was about five or six, my mom let me know that everyone dies, sooner or later—she was getting ready to attend a funeral for Sid Kass, a boy a few years my senior who’d been killed in a freak accident at school.

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Do We Really Need 24/7 “Breaking News”?

I’ve decided that 24/7 newscasts on cable TV aren’t much different from the following assessment of Major League Baseball: “There are only 18 minutes of total action in an average baseball game,” according to a Snapple bottle cap, a usually reliable source.

The comment could have gone on to say that those 18 minutes of action get crammed into more than three hours—but how much verbiage can one squeeze into the average bottle cap, which has a diameter of only 1.17 inches? (And in case you’re wondering, the cap’s info came from PolitiFact, an actually reliable source.)

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Are You an Anti-Semantic? Time to be Outed!

Are You an Anti-Semantic? Time to be Outed!

Warning: There are some people out there who are dangerous anti-semantics. Like the ones who think “irregardless” is a fine word, and should be included in our dictionaries.

I’m the exact opposite. Words are my world. Consequently, I spend entirely too much time wondering why we pay doctors, dentists and lawyers so much money to “practice,” then allow one of the latter to represent us at a “trial” which also means an “experiment” or a “test.”

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Close the US Post Office? Undeliverable!

Close the US Post Office? Undeliverable!

Close the US Post Office? Undeliverable! No one’s going to close our beloved, infuriating, Constitution-protected organizationBy Ed Goldman hate to start this with a mixed metaphor—I prefer shaken, with just a hint of dry vermouth—but the...

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For Some of Us, Memorial Day is a Day of Atonement

Memorial Day has always been a day of atonement for me since only six numbers prevented my being called up to serve in the U.S. Army in 1969.

It was during the height of the Vietnam War and the reboot of the Selective Service System’s draft lottery for the first time since 1942. Men born from January 1, 1944 through December 31, 1950, were eligible. I was born on November 15, 1950. If I’d been able to hang around in utero for another 17 days, I’d have been home free.

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Patriotism and Piggery, Stoicism and Panic: Together Again!

Patriotism and Piggery, Stoicism and Panic: Together Again!

Apparently, there’s a fine line between commendable stoicism and abject terror.

“Amid massive drops in the numbers of heart attacks and strokes treated at local hospitals, doctors are worried that patients are avoiding the emergency room out of fear of catching Covid-19,” reported Felicia Alvarez in the Sacramento Business Journal, one of my almae matres.

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Confessions of a Political Know-Nothing!

Starting with the election of Donald Trump as president in 2016—and the simultaneous dissolution of the alleged world order of American politics—I’ve come to realize that despite my decades in journalism, with side trips into marketing and public affairs—I know absolutely nothing.

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It May Be High Nunes for Devin

It May Be High Nunes for Devin

Today’s column may seem pitched to our Fresno readership (a really nice person, by the way) but it concerns more than the Central Valley or even all of California. This is about the entire country and the chance voters (and donors) have to not only set a precedent but also to put someone in office who knows whereof he speaks when it comes to healthcare, water, immigrants and small business.

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Family Business Succession

When I was young, I thought it would be great to someday join my mom and dad in the family business. But they never had one.

What reminded me of my long-ago wish was reading recently about a statewide association of family business owners based in Sacramento and …

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The Master of Suspension

As of this coming July 1, kids from kindergarten through eighth grade won’t be suspended when they misbehave. Of course, since most kids won’t be in school, anyway, on July 1, and therefore not misbehaving there, I’m finding the scheduled launch of this new law a little counterintuitive.

It’s a little like banning the…

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Calif Primary

My market research consultant York Ray-Zee—please sound out her name and we’ll get along just fine—burst into my office a few moments ago, all “het’ up.” (“Het’ up” is an expression no one I know actually says, along with “’Sup?”)

“Dr. Goldman,” she respectfully said …

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State’s Tech Program

A billion dollars in 2019 money is, like, a billion dollars.

I mention this because 13 years from now, you’re likely to see a sentence like this: “Back in 2019, the budget for California’s planned accounting technology improvement program went past $1 billion—which…

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Breakfast

I’ve always thought that breakfast is the most self-important meal of the day. It shows up on nearly every diet plan as essential, and we continue to be fascinated by the important people who have it each day and what a good one may consist of for them.

The most …

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Geezers for President

Now that former three-term New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg has decided to enter the race for the democratic presidential nomination, the ages of some of the contenders for septuagenarian Donald Trump’s job—Joe Biden, Elizabeth Warren, Bernie Sanders and Bloomberg, also all in their 70s—are making this look less …

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