{"id":2616,"date":"2020-05-27T04:00:00","date_gmt":"2020-05-27T11:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/?p=2616"},"modified":"2020-05-27T08:40:18","modified_gmt":"2020-05-27T15:40:18","slug":"the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/","title":{"rendered":"The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>[et_pb_section fb_built=&#8221;1&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.0.1&#8243; custom_padding=&#8221;19px||23px|||&#8221;][et_pb_row _builder_version=&#8221;4.3.2&#8243; global_module=&#8221;2377&#8243; saved_tabs=&#8221;all&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.3.2&#8243;][et_pb_image src=&#8221;https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Golden_Pacific_Bank.jpg&#8221; url=&#8221;https:\/\/goldenpacificbank.com&#8221; url_new_window=&#8221;on&#8221; align=&#8221;center&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.1&#8243; border_width_all=&#8221;1px&#8221;][\/et_pb_image][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=&#8221;4.0.1&#8243; min_height=&#8221;114px&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;17px||2px|||&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.0.1&#8243;][et_pb_post_title title=&#8221;off&#8221; author=&#8221;off&#8221; categories=&#8221;off&#8221; comments=&#8221;off&#8221; featured_image=&#8221;off&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.0.2&#8243; meta_font=&#8221;|700|on||||||&#8221; meta_text_align=&#8221;center&#8221; meta_text_color=&#8221;#ff0000&#8243; custom_margin=&#8221;||0px||false|false&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;||0px||false|false&#8221;][\/et_pb_post_title][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243; min_height=&#8221;75px&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;||0px||false|false&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;||0px|||&#8221;]<\/p>\n<h1 style=\"text-align: center;\">The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles<\/h1>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243; header_2_font=&#8221;Georgia|300|||||||&#8221; header_2_font_size=&#8221;21px&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;-5px||0px||false|false&#8221;]<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\">Recalling when calling your girlfriend or boyfriend could upset a household\u2019s balance<\/h2>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=&#8221;4.0.3&#8243; custom_padding=&#8221;0px||0px|||&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.0.3&#8243;][et_pb_text admin_label=&#8221;Author&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.0.1&#8243; header_4_text_align=&#8221;center&#8221; header_6_text_align=&#8221;center&#8221; header_6_font_size=&#8221;13px&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;||2px|||&#8221;]<\/p>\n<h6>By Ed Goldman<\/h6>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=&#8221;4.3.2&#8243; module_alignment=&#8221;center&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;|auto||179px||&#8221; module_alignment_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; module_alignment_phone=&#8221;&#8221; module_alignment_last_edited=&#8221;on|phone&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.0.1&#8243;][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243;]<span class='et-dropcap'>S<\/span>ince I wrote (and not lovingly) <a href=\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/20\/not-aging-well-take-a-number\/\">about aging<\/a> the other day, I\u2019m hoping you\u2019ll still indulge me today in a senior moment.<\/p>\n<p>No, I\u2019m not going to begin a story, forget all the details midway through then ask why Johnny Carson wasn\u2019t on again last night (this guy sure takes a lot of days off, doesn\u2019t he?). Nor am I going to mention finding my reading glasses in the cat\u2019s litter box\u2014or ask someone to provide me with \u201cthe phone number of 911.\u201d[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_code admin_label=&#8221;TV Online Ad &#8211; Facemasks&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243; global_module=&#8221;2603&#8243; saved_tabs=&#8221;all&#8221;]<a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/shareasale.com\/r.cfm?b=1540304&#038;u=1383997&#038;m=28718&#038;urllink=&#038;afftrack=goldman\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><img decoding=\"async\" data-src=\"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png\" border=\"0\" alt=\"TV Store Online\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" class=\"lazyload\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" data-src=\"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png\" border=\"0\" alt=\"TV Store Online\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" class=\"lazyload\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png\" border=\"0\" alt=\"TV Store Online\" \/><\/noscript><\/noscript><\/a>[\/et_pb_code][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m not about to ask any of my lawyer friends if CBS-TV\u2019s \u201cSixty Minutes\u201d can be sued for stealing its theme song from my wristwatch.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Finally, I\u2019m certainly not going to insist that all of the popular songs of my era were intellectually up-lifting. Exhibit A: The opening two verses of \u201cWooly Bully,\u201d the 1965 hit recorded by Sam the Sham and the Pharaohs:\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cMatty told Hatty\/About a thing she saw\/Had two big horns\/And a wooly jaw\/Wooly Bully\/Wooly Bully\/Wooly Bully\/Wooly Bully\/Wooly Bully.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cHatty told Matty\/Let&#8217;s don&#8217;t take no chance\/Let&#8217;s not be L 7*\/Come and learn to dance\/Wooly Bully\/Wooly Bully\/Wooly Bully\/Wooly Bully\u2026.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p>Lyrics like those make you forget Stephen Sondheim, Cole Porter, Irving Berlin, Allan Jay Lerner, Paul Simon and Lennon-McCartney for a moment, don\u2019t they?<\/p>\n<p>No, what I want to do today is briefly comment on one thing that\u2019s exponentially changed in my lifetime\u2014including, of course, the ubiquitous deployment of the word \u201cexponentially\u201d when we just mean \u201cwith increasing speed\u201d or \u201ca helluva lot.\u201d For that matter, \u201cubiquitous\u201d just means \u201call over the place,\u201d and is especially annoying when said aloud: Is it \u201coooh-biquitous\u201d or \u201cyou-biquitous?\u201d Text me at #whogivesadamn.**\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text admin_label=&#8221;Adsense&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.3.2&#8243; text_orientation=&#8221;center&#8221;]<script async src=\"https:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js\"><\/script><br \/>\n<!-- gs_horizontal_new --><br \/>\n<ins class=\"adsbygoogle\"\n     style=\"display:block\"\n     data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-8489921453224987\"\n     data-ad-slot=\"5069548950\"\n     data-ad-format=\"auto\"\n     data-full-width-responsive=\"true\"><\/ins><br \/>\n<script>\n     (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});\n<\/script>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p>Okay, right when you least expect it: the topic.<\/p>\n<p>This all came out of a joke shared with MBK (my beloved Kim) in one of our hour-long nightly phone calls. When we were in love as teenagers, and both of us lived in Southern California\u2014where she still does, ergo the hour-long nightly phone calls\u2014our parents pressured us to end our then-even-longer calls. My mom (the chief pressurer) used to shout from the den, \u201cI\u2019m expecting an important call\u201d\u2014which, if there\u2019s a Heaven and she made the cut, I suspect she still is. I think my mom fantasized that she was an international diplomat whose recipe for blintzes could have put an end to war.<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p>This should tell you something about the times in which Kim and I grew up. There was only one phone line in most homes and until my parents splurged on it, no additional phone (which we called an \u201cextension\u201d). My mom, who was a great money saver, thought it would be cheaper to have just one phone in the house but connect a very long cord to it, since the phone company charged you an extra dollar or so a month for each additional phone, even when they all had the same number.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>The error of my mom\u2019s logic surfaced on more than on occasion when my dad, my mom, my brothers or I got a foot wrapped up in the cord and did a pratfall while heading to the bathroom in the middle of the night.<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p>Kim\u2019s and my joke today when our calls run long is that we\u2019d better say goodnight because our folks might want to use the phone.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Well, 75 percent of Kim\u2019s and my parents have left the building (and her mom just turned a robust 98!) and the notion that a household today with more than one person would have only one phone is comical. For all I know, my cat Osborn the Magnificent has not only his own phone but also more Instagram and Twitter followers than I do.<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text admin_label=&#8221;Adsense&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.3.2&#8243; text_orientation=&#8221;center&#8221;]<script async src=\"https:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js\"><\/script><br \/>\n<!-- gs_horizontal_new --><br \/>\n<ins class=\"adsbygoogle\"\n     style=\"display:block\"\n     data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-8489921453224987\"\n     data-ad-slot=\"5069548950\"\n     data-ad-format=\"auto\"\n     data-full-width-responsive=\"true\"><\/ins><br \/>\n<script>\n     (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});\n<\/script>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p>So listen up, young people: Be grateful you live in a time when\u2014despite a global pandemic, the constant threat of a world war with Korea or China, a president who, in service to his ego and out of the most transparent case of stupidity since Walt Disney\u2019s Goofy, has made the greatest country on the planet an international embarrassment\u2014you can now call your boyfriend or girlfriend and stay on the phone for hours (though certain roaming charges may apply).<\/p>\n<p>And on that note let me close with the inspirational final verse of \u201cWooly Bully,\u201d as well as offer an erudite footnote,\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cMatty told Hatty\/That&#8217;s a thing to do.\/Get you someone really\/Pull the wool with you\/Wooly Bully\/Wooly Bully\/Wooly Bully\/Wooly Bully\/Wooly Bully.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>*In this usage, \u201cL7\u201d does not refer to a part of one\u2019s spinal nerve. It\u2019s a visual clue for \u201csquare,\u201d as in when you have an L and a 7 forgo social distancing.<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243; hover_enabled=&#8221;0&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p>**It&#8217;s\u00a0\u201cyou-biquitous.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Note to National Education Association: When you send me a public service award for the above footnotes, please note my address changed three years ago\u2014which, I suspect, is why your previous awards haven\u2019t reached me. Please call me for my new address. We can talk for hours. <span class=\"endingG\"> <\/span><\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_code admin_label=&#8221;TV Online Ad &#8211; Facemasks&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.4.7&#8243; global_module=&#8221;2603&#8243; saved_tabs=&#8221;all&#8221;]<a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/shareasale.com\/r.cfm?b=1540304&#038;u=1383997&#038;m=28718&#038;urllink=&#038;afftrack=goldman\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><img decoding=\"async\" data-src=\"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png\" border=\"0\" alt=\"TV Store Online\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" class=\"lazyload\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" data-src=\"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png\" border=\"0\" alt=\"TV Store Online\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" class=\"lazyload\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png\" border=\"0\" alt=\"TV Store Online\" \/><\/noscript><\/noscript><\/a>[\/et_pb_code][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=&#8221;4.3.2&#8243; module_alignment=&#8221;center&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;|auto||0px|false|false&#8221; module_alignment_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; module_alignment_phone=&#8221;&#8221; module_alignment_last_edited=&#8221;on|phone&#8221; border_color_top=&#8221;#E02B20&#8243; global_module=&#8221;1122&#8243; saved_tabs=&#8221;all&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.0.6&#8243;][et_pb_text module_class=&#8221;AuthorBioBox&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.2.2&#8243; text_font=&#8221;Georgia||on||||||&#8221; text_text_color=&#8221;#444&#8243; text_font_size=&#8221;14px&#8221; text_line_height=&#8221;1.7em&#8221;]<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/about-ed\/\">Ed Goldman&#8217;s<\/a> column appears almost every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. A former daily columnist for the Sacramento Business Journal, as well as monthly columnist for Sacramento Magazine and Comstock\u2019s Business Magazine, he\u2019s the author of five books, two plays and one musical (so far).<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n<span class=\"et_bloom_bottom_trigger\"><\/span>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Since I wrote (and not lovingly) about aging the other day, I\u2019m hoping you\u2019ll still indulge me today in a senior moment. <\/p>\n<p>No, I\u2019m not going to begin a story, forget all the details midway through then ask why Johnny Carson wasn\u2019t on again last night (this guy sure takes a lot of days off, doesn\u2019t he?). Nor am I going to mention finding my reading glasses in the cat\u2019s litter box\u2014or ask someone to provide me with \u201cthe phone number of 911.\u201d <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[19,21],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v22.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles - The Goldman State by Ed Goldman<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles - The Goldman State by Ed Goldman\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Since I wrote (and not lovingly) about aging the other day, I\u2019m hoping you\u2019ll still indulge me today in a senior moment.  No, I\u2019m not going to begin a story, forget all the details midway through then ask why Johnny Carson wasn\u2019t on again last night (this guy sure takes a lot of days off, doesn\u2019t he?). Nor am I going to mention finding my reading glasses in the cat\u2019s litter box\u2014or ask someone to provide me with \u201cthe phone number of 911.\u201d\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Goldman State by Ed Goldman\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/ed.goldman.54\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/ed.goldman.54\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2020-05-27T11:00:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2020-05-27T15:40:18+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Ed Goldman\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@https:\/\/twitter.com\/GoldmanEd\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@GoldmanEd\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Ed Goldman\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"7 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Ed Goldman\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/2241a130d4e86bceeaf679953c825639\"},\"headline\":\"The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles\",\"datePublished\":\"2020-05-27T11:00:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2020-05-27T15:40:18+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/\"},\"wordCount\":1428,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/2241a130d4e86bceeaf679953c825639\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png\",\"articleSection\":[\"People\",\"Whimsy\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/\",\"name\":\"The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles - The Goldman State by Ed Goldman\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png\",\"datePublished\":\"2020-05-27T11:00:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2020-05-27T15:40:18+00:00\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png\"},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/\",\"name\":\"The Goldman State by Ed Goldman\",\"description\":\"The New Thrice-Weekly Column About California for  Demanding Readers Who Know What &quot;Thrice&quot; Means.\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/2241a130d4e86bceeaf679953c825639\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":[\"Person\",\"Organization\"],\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/2241a130d4e86bceeaf679953c825639\",\"name\":\"Ed Goldman\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/54dc5c17204c49e86e8eaa13f311d3e8?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/54dc5c17204c49e86e8eaa13f311d3e8?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Ed Goldman\"},\"logo\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\"},\"description\":\"Ed Goldman\u2019s column appears almost every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. A former daily columnist for the Sacramento Business Journal, as well as monthly columnist for Sacramento Magazine and Comstock\u2019s Business Magazine, he\u2019s the author of five books, two plays and one musical (so far).\",\"sameAs\":[\"http:\/\/edgoldmancommunications.com\",\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/ed.goldman.54\",\"https:\/\/x.com\/https:\/\/twitter.com\/GoldmanEd\"]}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles - The Goldman State by Ed Goldman","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles - The Goldman State by Ed Goldman","og_description":"Since I wrote (and not lovingly) about aging the other day, I\u2019m hoping you\u2019ll still indulge me today in a senior moment.  No, I\u2019m not going to begin a story, forget all the details midway through then ask why Johnny Carson wasn\u2019t on again last night (this guy sure takes a lot of days off, doesn\u2019t he?). Nor am I going to mention finding my reading glasses in the cat\u2019s litter box\u2014or ask someone to provide me with \u201cthe phone number of 911.\u201d","og_url":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/","og_site_name":"The Goldman State by Ed Goldman","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/ed.goldman.54","article_author":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/ed.goldman.54","article_published_time":"2020-05-27T11:00:00+00:00","article_modified_time":"2020-05-27T15:40:18+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png"}],"author":"Ed Goldman","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@https:\/\/twitter.com\/GoldmanEd","twitter_site":"@GoldmanEd","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Ed Goldman","Est. reading time":"7 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/"},"author":{"name":"Ed Goldman","@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/2241a130d4e86bceeaf679953c825639"},"headline":"The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles","datePublished":"2020-05-27T11:00:00+00:00","dateModified":"2020-05-27T15:40:18+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/"},"wordCount":1428,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/2241a130d4e86bceeaf679953c825639"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png","articleSection":["People","Whimsy"],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/","url":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/","name":"The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles - The Goldman State by Ed Goldman","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png","datePublished":"2020-05-27T11:00:00+00:00","dateModified":"2020-05-27T15:40:18+00:00","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/static.shareasale.com\/image\/28718\/facemasksbanner.png"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/2020\/05\/27\/the-invention-of-limitless-phone-calls\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"The Invention of Limitless Phone Calls, and Other Modern Miracles"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/","name":"The Goldman State by Ed Goldman","description":"The New Thrice-Weekly Column About California for  Demanding Readers Who Know What &quot;Thrice&quot; Means.","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/2241a130d4e86bceeaf679953c825639"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":["Person","Organization"],"@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/2241a130d4e86bceeaf679953c825639","name":"Ed Goldman","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/54dc5c17204c49e86e8eaa13f311d3e8?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/54dc5c17204c49e86e8eaa13f311d3e8?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Ed Goldman"},"logo":{"@id":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/"},"description":"Ed Goldman\u2019s column appears almost every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. A former daily columnist for the Sacramento Business Journal, as well as monthly columnist for Sacramento Magazine and Comstock\u2019s Business Magazine, he\u2019s the author of five books, two plays and one musical (so far).","sameAs":["http:\/\/edgoldmancommunications.com","https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/ed.goldman.54","https:\/\/x.com\/https:\/\/twitter.com\/GoldmanEd"]}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2616"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2616"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2616\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2616"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2616"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goldmanstate.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2616"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}